Back at it…

I have had a lot happen in my life and an unexpected long hiatus.  Here is my attempt to revitalize my Temic world through blogging. Temic society has never been far from my thoughts!

I am struggling with the writing process and all my characters are screaming at me because, believe me, I have no problems making them real. It’s the moving them around in chapter format that I have trouble with.

But, my adventures start again!  More to come…

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Writing is Hard Work…and I Love It!

Hello, World!

I promised myself I would get better at blogging, tweeting, Facebooking, an all things social media, but I’m bad at keeping that promise.

Because writing for Totem is WORK!

I’m on Chapter 6 now… not sure if they’re good, are going to stay in that order, or if they have plot holes that can swallow a galaxy. But, I’m proud of it.  I’ve learned a few things in the process.

1- When they say write every day, I learned that it’s only true for some people, and it’s really only just a good textbook scenario.  When I try to write every day, that’s when I get writer’s block. I learned that, if I step back for a few days, a sudden inspiration hits…usually while I’m doing something in which it would be completely inconvenient for me to write it down or put it in my phone.  Like when I’m changing a diaper, talking to a co-worker, or in the shower. After that inspiration hits, I get a flow of 2,000 words!

2- I’ve learned that characters have a definite mind of their own. I imagine this is why God might get so frustrated. I don’t even have omnipotence in my toolbox. Your creations are meant to do or say one thing, but you don’t know what they’re about to do next to counteract your hard-earned plans. Or they decide they have an addiction to energy drinks in the middle of your chapter and, suddenly, it’s what drives the next event. Yes, that happened. So, since Eddie likes energy drinks, it’s apparently going to have to be there the rest of the book. Thanks, Eddie.

3- Sometimes characters walk into your party uninvited and then refuse to leave. I have a sinister henchman that did that. But, I assume it’s within his character. Henchman don’t send RSVPs or ask to be a “plus 1” before they hurt you.

4- Sometimes a character will make you aware that they are a major character and the story’s whole premise wouldn’t make sense without them – even though they were a quirky side character to begin with. And then she ends up being the background decoration of most of the chapters. Sneaky, sneaky. But, she’s turning on to be my favorite character so far.

5- Finally, I’ve learned that when they say not to go back and rewrite until you’re done…loads of bull. I can’t help it. That’s how those black hole sized plot holes happen. I’ve had things change on me (I swear, it’s the characters doing it) in Chapter 5 that now make something in Chapter 2 irrelevant and I have to change it NOW or I’ll never keep it straight in my head. So much for “just write and go back and edit later”, right?

So, Chapter 6, and how many more to go? I’m sweating so hard I am surprised this endeavor hasn’t been a good weight loss regimen.  I also have new respect for George R. R. Martin. I know everyone wants him to get movin’ already, but I don’t have to keep up with a quarter of the people and viewpoints he has, and it’s taking me forever to get it straight! How he and J.K. Rowling ever did this without a staff of secretaries, I’ll never know. I just make my husband edit and read. That’s what he signed up for when he married me.

I really want to say that I’ll see you sometime this week or next, when I realize there’s a world out there, but trying to manage a fake world is just as hard as trying to run your real one!

So, until next time.

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What a difference some distance from writings makes…

It’s amazing.  With finishing the degree, I hadn’t touched my book (or this blog) until last week.

And in that time my book changed itself. Characters started changing on me and things feel evolved, almost as if the book’s been working behind the scenes so it didn’t waste any time while I couldn’t hang out. While I was writing heavy theoretical papers, Totem was living on while I wasn’t paying attention.

In that time, my protagonist’s daughter decided she wanted to be in her 20’s, not a teenager.  Fine with me.

A priest inserted himself in there.  He’s a Monkey Temic. Those chattering, maybe wise, tricksters….  So, now there’s a priest involved as a major character. Okay.

And then another “bad guy” joined the party, and now I feel like my head is getting beat up with two bad guys, one who’s evil and one who’s just very, very pathetic and misguided. He’s not evil, but he’s done too much evil. And is he redeemable?  Who knows?

I guess I’d better get moving before things change again.  But, if I had not taken this sabbatical from writing, would this have changed anyway? Or is it because I had time to second guess?

Who cares. At least no one messed with my favorite character. She’s still as awesome as ever!

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A Scary New Path

I’m back!

I haven’t posted in so long and I’m so happy to be able to concentrate on writing again! Well…on writing what I want to write!

I have been reading assigned books and working on academic paper after paper, leaving no room whatsoever for my fiction or blogging.

But on Saturday it will be official! I will have earned that well-deserved Master’s degree in English and I can put all my full time efforts into my short stories and blogs.  I can live and breathe Totem and its characters and back stories for as long as it takes and as much as I want to!

I turned in my last paper today.  It was 22 pages long. As I walked across campus after turning it in, I took a different route.  I guess a part of me felt sad, but another part wanted to embrace the change.  A lot is going to change now.  I have spent the last 32 years in some form of education, always beholden to deadlines and projects, grades and MLA format.  Now, I need to start the next era of life, where I am beholden to my imagination!  I can start living out of my head and transferring it to paper.

And I chose a different path because I wanted to mark the beginning of this new phase of life with a deliberate choice, unencumbered by anyone else’s expectations or needs. I walked back to my office building on my own terms.

I know that probably seems silly, but it meant a lot at that moment, to symbolically and literally take another path.

It will be a scary path.  I have been institutionalized to academia for so long, that I’m not sure what to expect in such an unstructured world.

Let’s see what happens, scary or not, and go where the world of Totem takes me!

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The Crow and The Butterfly, Part 3

Stuart’s mind had stayed consumed with thoughts of Issie all day. He halfheartedly filled an order, performed his inventory, and humored some tourists, but all he could think about was Issie.  It wasn’t really that she seemed to know he was Temic, but the coincidence of her appearing to be Korean and fixated on butterflies made him relive the memories of his past. The images of Hwa Ja and Haneul became his waking vision for the day.  The phone rang. Continue reading

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Bees and Wasps: Spiritual Evolution, Order and Productivity

I had weird dreams about bees and wasps last night. They were attacking my head.

For bees, “When we dream of bees it may be an indication that we are ready to communicate our spiritual gifts, or perhaps we should more clearly recognize the treasures that reside within us.”

For wasps, “Symbol of evolution, and control over our life circumstances. Symbol of order, organization as well as productivity and fertility.”

Animal Totems

Hmmm…that’s been a lot of my life lately. I’ve been thinking a lot about my health troubles, writing, the spiritual nature of what I’m writing, and the idea that you control your experience in all areas of your life. Literally everything.  Thanks, Spirit Science.

Spirit Science: The Secrets of how to Manifest Anything

I guess attacking my face is one way to get my attention. So glad it was just a dream, because I feel like those creatures would have given their little lives to send me that message if it was real.

Ugh…shivers. I don’t do wasps. All I can say is they’d better stay spiritual…

In other news, if you’ve been following The Crow and The Butterfly, please look forward to the final installment next week!

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Thailand’s an Inspiration in a World of Depression and Political Correctness

Hello all!

I know this is not Temic in nature.  Sorry! But, every once in a while something might hit me like a brick and then I just HAVE to share it.  I saw a video today that opened a can of worms, so here you go:

Our country is bombarded with depressing and horrific news media and our fantasy is covered in zombies, vampires, and the post-apocalyptic dystopia.

Even our news is about the worst things we can find and, if it’s not bad enough, it’s written to appear worse. Or even titled to appear positive, only to bring you to something unexpectedly depressing.

All of our “empowering” commercials are bombarded with criticism to the company that puts them out.  We have to try so hard to be PC. Being nice or diverse or just plain not sexist or racist has become PC. The country “slams” every move advertisers, celebrities, and companies make. If you’re not on board with whatever fad we’re on now, you get slammed. Your company loses business.

I’m not sure it’s possible anymore to get it right. For example, a commercial that advocates that natural female bodies are beautiful to combat the unhealthy skinny trend, and uses a diverse group of women, gets bashed because the African-American lady wasn’t black enough.  Really? People just can’t be pleased. Are we supposed to not notice people’s skin color in some settings, like in careers, acting,  and other things, but absolutely concentrate on noticing it for other things?  We have to notice skin color to make it appear like we don’t notice skin color?

How is anyone supposed to get that right? Weren’t we supposed to just be selling soap here?

How are we supposed to be naturally good, kind, diverse, non-racist people as a country if we have to keep putting on a fake front that we are? Just be good and kind. Simple as the man in this video does it.

If you read forums, even on supposedly positive pages, commenters’ first reaction is often to either not believe the story or possibly find the worst thing about it to comment on. Or somehow twist a cute kid video or a heart-warming graduation speech about life possibilities into a rant about Obama and how his Nazi Muslim far left baby-killing views are ruining the world because he’s the Anti-Christ.  Right. Because extremist beliefs have anything whatsoever to do with a four man rescue of a horse?

Even this video wasn’t immune to negativity.  I read one comment that took everything beautiful he was doing and still brought the topic back to money. He had to do all this with money. He was only generous because of money. And I beg to differ.  Pulling an old woman’s cart up on a curb had nothing to do with money and neither does watering a plant. Honestly, did the commenter watch the video at all? Why do people like that bother watching at all if what they want is to find the “gotcha” part of why this video can’t possibly be good?

Yes, he used money. He bought his own lunch and dipped into his wallet for bananas and to give to a little beggar girl several times. But, he shared his lunch with a dog. Does that only matter if it was free lunch? Does using money somehow diminish his kindness?

You use what you have.  You turn something that does cause trouble all over the world and you do differently with it. You do good.  While others are hoarding their money, talking about money, and concentrating on judging others about money, this commercial advocates that the feelings you get out of doing wonderful things with your money is more powerful and rewarding than being rich or buying things. You even see the guy hesitate about how much he has in his wallet and decides to do the right thing because he was faced with a choice. And, as I tell my kids, if you’re faced with a choice, always do the least selfish thing.

He had the money to give. But, not really. Look at the state of the man’s apartment in the video. He definitely could have used his money. But, other creatures were more important. And he didn’t just help with money. He conscientiously thought about others everyday. Plants, animals, and people and whatever it is that made them better. It might be money, but maybe it’s just a warm meal, some water, help every morning or just a nice gesture to you because I want you to know that I know you’re here and I also happen to know you like bananas.

If we want people to change or America to concentrate its efforts on uniting people instead of fighting each other on every detail…if we want to make it not only permissible, but expected, that we build a culture of service to others, we can change our country and our planets with simple acts like this, no matter who you are.

It’s the intentions that count.

Five Ads That Prove Thai Life Insurance Commercials Are The Saddest Commercials Ever | Junkee.


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The Crow and the Butterfly, Part 2

Hanna Cochran sipped on the weak hotel coffee as she looked at her daughter, playing on the bed. Her short, black hair was still wet from the swimming pool, and she was cross-legged, drawing on her chalkboard. She was never without that chalkboard. Continue reading

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Three Kids and Three Lessons


As I continue writing the second installment of, “The Crow and the Butterfly” (which I promise to finish by next week), I am becoming increasingly aware of when animals showed in my life and I didn’t realize it.

Funny what being forced to pay attention through writing makes you see in hindsight.

Butterflies are agents of change. When they show up, they ask you to deal with the unexpected, to see events as trans-formative and fluid.  The butterfly marks a time of transition in the learning of the soul and they can teach us to accept the change that comes with grace and eloquence. Continue reading

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I watched Jim Carrey this morning and it’s all better now…

Starting something new is always scary.

I am a creative person with a lot to say.  Once I believed I would go to film school, and I did more “practical” things and regretted that ever since. I was too young to realize I had power to not agree with my parents’ fear-based ideas. Where was Jim Carrey when I was 18? Continue reading

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